25 Jan 2011

January 25, 2011

It takes a lot of energy to not like a person. It’s almost not even worth it anymore.

I was remembering these people I used to talk to at an old job, people who would call for help. One woman’s husband was cheating on her with his own sister. Stuff like that all the time. It wasn’t healthy to listen to it all day long. But what I was thinking about was how the people still managed to keep going, keep going to the grocery store, keep brushing their teeth at night. What I’m saying is that people get by.

I’ve always pictured food stamps as actual stamps. I see myself standing at a counter, licking one after the other, sticking them to some accounting sheet the checker keeps at the register.

At least rock bottom is stable.

The man next to me this morning was tapping his fingers on the arm of his chair. tap. tap. tap. He sat there for an hour, tapping. I wanted to stand over him and ask why he wasn’t doing anything with his life.

Back to that old job. A guy named Dave used to call me every day. He had some sort of mental problem: docile, lovable. He told me his favorite book was Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court, so I got his address and sent him a copy. I don’t know if he ever got it, but it made me happy to think about.

I’m glad Sam Beam keeps making albums, not matter how weird they get.

I don’t believe in blogs. I believe in books.


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